Understanding People from Different Places

Ok, so most people didn’t like the last video in my last blog.  Fair enough.

I appreciate your honesty and I’ll be careful when recommending that kind of thing in the future.  Sometimes learning what you guys don’t like is as important as learning what you do like.  For us to do the best job in the world of teaching you guys, we need to understand you at a deeper level.  I think this blog, and your comments, is helping this process a lot.

As you guys know, Add and I are Canadians living in Shanghai.

Shanghai is a pretty international city and we see interesting stuff here all the time.  There are tons of white people in the city.  When we see other Canadians or Americans and speak with them for just a few minutes, we know almost exactly what kind of people they are.  They know the same about us too.  It’s easy to “size up” or develop a pretty accurate idea about someone who comes from your own culture.

I can tell if they went to university or not, I can tell if they had a lot of friends in high school, I can even guess how they behave in a club.  Of course I won’t be right all the time, but I’ll have a pretty good idea if these are people from my culture.

I assume you feel the same way when you meet someone from your own culture in a new place.  If you were travelling in New York City, for example, and met a person from your own country, I guess you could quickly make some very good guesses about this person after only a few minutes of talking.   You will know if they are funny, shy, confident, arrogant, etc.  You’ll probably be able to guess if they grew up in a big city or a small town in the countryside.   This is because everyone has a deep understanding of their own culture and how people from their cultures should behave, and usually do behave in most situations.

It gets interesting when people from 2 totally different cultures meet for the first time.  It takes A LOT longer for each person to fully understand what kind of person are they meeting when they are from “different worlds”.  In our minds we may have questions like, “Do all Canadians act this way, or is this person just weird?”  The same could be said for people from any culture.  You get the idea.

This reality can be difficult and frustrating for Add and I with this website.  We want you guys to really know us and who we are as people, but it’s hard because we’re all from different places.  We totally understand this too.  We believe you should be skeptical when you see people you don’t really know trying to sell you stuff.

When we say that we have the best VIP program, or are teaching the most commonly used native slang on the internet, or we say we’ll make your English WAY better than it would be using any other method, how would you really know 100% for sure if we are telling the truth?  It’s easy for us to praise our own website because it’s our website, but is what we’re saying really true?  How would you know?

The only way I can think of that would help you, is for you to ask other native speakers what they HONESTLY think.  They will know immediately.  It makes me sick to see so many English teaching websites on the internet that totally suck.  They sound like they would teach useful stuff, but they really don’t.  How do I know this?  Because I’m a native speaker and I can see what they are teaching.  It drives me crazy!

I’m sure you’ve had many similar experiences.  Many Asian girls often see western guys choosing ugly Asian girlfriends and walking hand in hand all over the city.  They always ask me why this happens.  Do the western people have bad taste?  Do they have different taste?  What is going on?  There are millions of examples of people making weird choices when they are “outside” of their own culture.  It’s hard for each of us to really know the truth about who is who and what is what.  So if you have any doubts about anything in terms of learning English or how western culture really is, ask a real westerner you know in your own life and trust.  If you don’t know any, I guess you’ll just have to take your best guess and do whatever feels right.

I’m not suggesting that you just believe everything I say just because I said it.  I would hate that.  I just hope you think about it for yourself.  I totally believe that you should try out every English learning method or website that seems good to you.  You should use what YOU like and what works for YOU.  Use whatever gets you the best results.  Just please be careful when choosing.  Most language schools and websites teach the stuff THEY THINK you want to learn.  They really don’t care about making your English level better.  They just want you to use their program.  You should judge us and our website in the same way.  Choose what’s best for you.  Just be careful.  This is important for YOU.

I’d love to hear your thoughts as always.  Your comments are fantastic!  Keep writing guys.  Keep letting us know what you think and what kinds of stuff you want to learn.

I’d also like to know what you think about this idea of people from different cultures having a very hard time really trusting and understanding each other.  Do you have this experience?

32 Responses to “Understanding People from Different Places”

  1. Kinga, 23, Poland Says:

    For me, last video was very funny and I would like to see guys more stuff like that. I also thing that we should have a little more distance to each other and take life a little bit less seriously.

    I fully agree that people from other cultures have hard time during the first moments in foreign country or even continent, but for me it’s normal. The worst is when you don’t know language of country where you are or even english language. You are lucky guys because you’re Canadian so you can use your native language on a whole world;)

    I also think that you do your job the best, keep it up! I waiting for more funny topic about food:)

  2. china232 Says:

    Thanks Kinga!

    Great response. Glad to hear liked the video too. Now I feel slightly less retarded for sharing it!

  3. Oksana Says:

    Re “Many Asian girls often see western guys choosing ugly Asian girlfriends and walking hand in hand all over the city. (…) There are millions of examples of people making weird choices when they are “outside” of their own culture.”
    I hate to break it to you, but seriosly guys your statements are inappropriate sometimes.. Tastes differ you know, maybe those “western guys” just consider those girls pretty, why calling them weird?
    I don’t mean to offend anyone, moreover I love what you do, but in my opinion there shouldn’t be those kind of statements (first of all from you as teachers).

  4. china232 Says:

    Thanks for your opinion Oksana.

    I certainly didn’t want to offend anyone with that statement. It’s just an example of something that many people seem to talk about here in China. I’ve heard similar things when I go to Korea too. I don’t mean to generalize about Chinese or Korean people either, it’s just something I’ve had several conversations about.

    It’s great hearing from you and I’m not at all offended by your comments. I truly hope you aren’t offended either.

    I like to discuss what is on my mind. That is my personality. I’m trying to create conversation and dialog on this website. My goal is certainly not to make anyone feel bad. Even if my statements may be direct or provocative, I don’t consider them inappropriate. Thanks for sharing your feelings though. I’ll consider them. Perhaps other people reading this share your thoughts too.

  5. Sergio Rodrigues Says:

    Just a little question. What does the expression “fair enough” means. I’ve already read some explanation but I still haven’t figured out the exact meaning.

  6. Lucy Says:

    It’s funny that my old assumption about white people’ inability to distinguish between beautiful and ugly Asian women has changed ever since i came to Calgary, Canada 9 months ago. I trust that there is some sort of international standard of beauty and ugliness. It’s just that they usually wouldn’t just go after appearance and youth as most of the Chinese men would do when it comes to developing a relationship.

  7. grace Says:

    I’m an asian girl too, a little bit offended by stereotyping of westerners but I don’t care what they say anyway. I hear them say asian beauties are exotic, that’s why western guys marry them, not so good huh.with that being said, they level down asian girls at some point, but not of a big deal because it’s not like that from our end.
    To china232, thumbs up for you , your site is helping lots of professionals around the world. Before I signed up as VIP , I’ve tried several online English class but they just didn’t meet what I needed to learn and yet I’m paying $37 a month. So, keep it up guys!

  8. china232 Says:

    Hi Grace.

    Great to hear you are enjoying the VIP lessons! I’m curious, are you still paying $37 per month at some other sites? What kind of program do they offer? I’ve seen stuff like that too.

    I’m also curious to know a bit more of what you mean by you being offended by stereotyping of westerners. I’m interested in hearing your experience on that.

    What does it mean to “level down”? Thanks Grace! :-)

  9. china232 Says:

    @Sergio,

    “Fair enough” means something like “Well, I respect your right to have that opinion. I may or may not agree with it, but I respect your right to have it”

    It’s a bit hard to explain every case but I think that explanation should help you to understand how it’s usually used.

    @Lucy

    How do you like living in Calgary? Where are you from BTW?

  10. sung Says:

    hi…china 232..

    you are really enthusiastic to make something great to english learners all over the world, that’s great spirit!!
    some kind of little tiny argue above,
    but i really get what you try to to give us
    i thought always [there is a lot of difference SENSE of BEAUTY]
    to somebody’s eyes WEIRED,
    but to other’s eyes THE MOST BEAUTIFUL!!
    that’s why the LIFE is fun and interesting
    not matter of WEST or EAST..!!
    just matter of individual TASTE..!!
    as they ssying [Beauty is in the eye of the beholder]
    thanks and encourage you not to get frustrated by some weired response!!!and keep going on…on..////////////////////////////////

  11. Sereja Says:

    to Oksana, Grace and other girls: Please, don’t take offence. Just post you photos, and we’ll give our opinion to you

    to China232: Thank you guys. You are awesome

    to All (about learning english)
    Don’t study grammar
    Don’t study words
    Don’t be hurry – c.by Steve Kaufmann

  12. grace Says:

    I don’t want to mention the name of the site, the teachers were also good but unfortunately, I got bored with their lessons, and 37 bucks per month isn’t reasonable enough for the kind of lessons they are preparing. They will send me lesson set on my email consists of video and audio files along with it’s PDF. examples were story telling in different tenses which I got tired listening to for the whole month nothing else. They also have their own social site but only few members were active. I’m no longer a member since I joined your site.
    With westerners I believe but “not all” of them discriminate asians because of physical features, we are short, black hair, dark eyes and those things are enough reasons for “some” to say we’re ugly because we don’t look like western girls and we don’t act similarly either.And that’s why some find it weird when a western a guy, “good looking guy” dating ugly Asian girl. It didn’t happened to me it’s just something I’ve observed,and heard from people, I’m an asian and I’m happy of the way I look..I’m just sharing it to you guys but it’s not big a deal really.

  13. Agatha Says:

    Honestly, you guys are amazing :) people will always disagree with something and you will never be able please everyone. I don’t remember how I got to know this website but I’m glad I did, otherwise my English would be stuck like it was before I start listening to these podcasts. I talk to people from all over the world due to my job as a front desk clerk and I notice that the more you travel the more open minded you become, especially when it comes to understanding other cultures.

  14. Milan Says:

    Andy says: “Now I feel slightly less retarded for sharing it!”
    Well, some of the comments on the video weren’t much encouraging. But as you imply, the sense of humor depends on cultural environment and changes with time or with what you had to go thru. If you experienced e.g. civil war, serious accident or maybe 10 years mariage with children and mortgage, I am sure your sense of humor would have changed regardless the culture. I don’t mean reduce but simply change.
    In fact I envy you the ability to enjoy the video. I have the issue, not you!
    Milan

  15. Seth Says:

    Great article as always and definitely interesting. Generally, people are more or less different or at least that’s what I think. I’m from Bulgaria, Europe, and even though our country was socialist for about 30 years or something in the not so distant past, I feel Russians and other Slavic nations much less closer to me than people belonging to the Anglophone culture, i.e. British, American, Canadian, Australian people, etc. Why? Because I grew up watching movies in English, playing games in English and I spend half my free time on the internet doing stuff in English only and communicating with English-speaking people and I just don’t feel English like a ‘foreign’ language, because it’s a part of my life, if that makes any sense. :D But that’s definitely not the case with more ‘exotic’ cultures like the East Asian cultures…
    I liked your previous video, I didn’t laugh my ass off, but it was definitely funny. :)
    Keep up the good work guys!
    Cheers!

  16. hazem Says:

    Hey CHINA232, The best English learning web site ever! You may think that Im exaggerating, to be honest just a little. My native language is Farsi(Persian).I have been trying different ways to learn English,MY FAVORITE. Different English programs, videos,audios etc. They all have been useful but believe it or not, your way of teaching is one of the best. Using common slang and then describing them in a friendly and also funny way, with written material included.
    But as you mentioned, we need sth more than just using your website. And now a memory of traveling to a foreign country, Saudi Arabia. I couldnt use my English at all, it was frustrating that their English was awful!(even worse than mine) It was really bothering me, and I didnt know Arabic too. Some times their behavior was strange. Im really interested in being in an English country for a while, MY DREAM!
    I hope you keep teaching English, Im looking forward to hear from you. Oh I couldnt watch your last video, Im going to check it out.
    THANKS Andy and Add, THE WORLD, China 232 ;)

  17. Mr D Says:

    Hi guys! I am Russian living in Sweden. I don’t speak any Swedish because almost all Swedish people speak perfect English. And on the other hand I can understand how important is to be a part of society you are entering. And in this sense Swedish people are very friendly, tolerant and polite to foreigners. And it is exciting for me to see that people from all over the world feel safe and comfortable here. And mostly because surrounding give them appropriate respect, I believe. I laughed on the video even though I could predict one can say it is offending some people. And that was because I am Russian. I used to fight for “my rights” and place in the society when I lived in Russia. And any kind of such videos could offend me. Nowadays I can feel this “Russian” aggressiveness in my friends and relatives. This is what surroundings do on us. All events in our lives are neutral by their nature. Only we dress them up by our emotions and think them good or bad. I am sure Andy and Add didn’t want to offend anyone and probably they couldn’t even think about aspects in the video that could be offending for someone. That was funny disregarding whoever was it in the video! And I have been reading and listening to them for quite a while and I think they are very picky in choosing content because they are public, they have to. We see only what we wanna see and hear only what we wanna hear. If something offends me it means I take it on my own. Doing that I offend myself and start fighting against those who I received it from… Think about it guys.

  18. Sergey Says:

    Hey guys!
    This topic seems to be both interesting and important to find your way in the modern world. People are making generalizations all the time. I am from Russia and I learned that the hard way)). I have heard a lot that people in the western world, especiaaly from Noth America, for some reason think that Russians do nothing but drink vodka all day long,that there are bears wandering around Red Square (it’s in the center of Moscow). Recently I have come across a very curious public opinion poll: people from all over the world were asked to name three things that come into their mind when they here “Russia”. Fuuny enough, but the overwhelming majority named “communists”, “bear” and “vodka”))).
    If you don’t mind, I would like to bust these myths (I think many of you have seen or at least have heard about this show on Discovery Channel called “Mythbusters”)
    After the collapse of the USSR, we are no longer a communist state! You must be living in the parallel world if you think like this)
    The bear is considered to be a symbol of Russia, it is the main hero of many stories for kids, but with all due respect – thare are NO bears on Red Square!As well as there are no bears in any other city or town.
    Russians drink not more than any other nation in the world, although vodka is considered to be our national drink.
    The unfortunate reality is that people tend to think in stereotypes making sweeping generalazitions. It is funny how a bunch of people can tarnish the reputation of the whole nation. Never judge the book by its cover. I have had a working experience aboard a cruise ship. Lots of foreigners come to Russia every year and after 10 days there old perception of this country changes – people see that it’s not like that image that is created by mass media in their countries, they admit to the fact that Russians are friendly, they have sense of humor and they also have two hands, two legs and they breathe air! It’s the day of revelation. Of course, there are lots of morons, they are everywhere.
    wow, I really decided to get it off my chest! thanks guys for the job you are doing! You are absolutely right that everybody should find his or her own way of studing and not just jump on the bandwagon. Slang and idioms are extremely important part of any language to acquire if you don’t want to sound unnatural and too formal. When you hear foreigners speak ypur native language you can’t help noticing how ridiculous they sound. Then you realize that you probably sound the same to English speaking people. Keep on doing your great job, you are really rocking the house!

  19. Godfather93 Says:

    Ivan, 19. Belgrade, Serbia – Student.

    Yea, the video was funny, but i felt a bit sorry for the guy who made a sandwich. Though, he seems like a really cool guy..

    Btw, i love your podcasts.. I use to think of them like some kinda show. Just sit back, and enjoy.. hah :)

    Yea, one more thing. Do you guys possibly like and listen to Eminem?
    I’d really like to get an answer on that :)

  20. Flora Says:

    Years ago, my brother introduced the podcast from China232 to me when he was still a graduate student in Indiana. He said this one was cool and different from the other boring ones. I tried and I believe him. We usually begin to learn English from middle school all through college, I got straight A all the time, then when I first came to America, I simply didn’t understand what people were saying and they could barely understand me.

    I think English is a powerful tool, not just recombination of grammer+writing+listening, the stuff we learned from school. That is why I love the stuff of China232–stuff you can use in real situations and real conversations.

    It is true that people coming from same culture background would make acquaintance more easily. But I also think that trust between people also depends heavily on personalities from both parties and how we behave ourselves.

  21. Mary, Russia Says:

    One of the best thing about this blog is that we not only learn English but we are learning to understand other people from other countries and cultures. Just think about the fact that sometimes we can communicate with others since we know the same language but we still can’t understand each other even though we perfectly understand each word! We should know more about each other and now we have this opportunity. Look back at our parents – they didn’ have this opportunity, I mean it was impossible to get together different people from different places and discuss serious issues like in this blog as well as have fun like we had in previous one. Thank you guys for your job, probably by knowing each other better we could do our world more tolerant.

  22. Paul King Says:

    Hey guys, I tried a lot of different web sites but this is the best web site ever to learn English. You can see how native speakers really use it in their daily conversations. Unfortunately though, we can’t use casual conversation all the time and that’s the reason I also use another site, called “Voice of America”. You should check this out if you already don’t know about it. Speaking of understanding people from different countries, I’d say….there are many differences among countries or continents. I’ve been traveling a lot in my life because I’m a musician and also it’s a part of my job. I can recognize the differences between nations. For example, Germans, Americans or Russian people. Each of them are totally different and you have to understand their sense of humor or their typical behavior.
    You were right about recognizing people in your native language. It’s much easier than in other languages. I have to say that I still have this problem especially with black people and their accents.
    Anyway, I think the video was pretty funny. That was a really huge sandwich made by subway:-D

  23. Lucy Says:

    Well, the life in Calgary is more peaceful compared with the life in China or in Asia in general, which is a lot more competitive and stressful. Specially love the Rocky Mountains, the fresh air, the western cowboy culture, etc. The summer and fall is so beautiful here, the weather can be dramatic just during a day but I feel so much closer to Nature than when living in Beijing. I’m from Beijing, also lived in Shanghai and Singapore for years.
    BTW, just a thought, it looks like you guys’ target market should be the English learners outside China rather than within China.

  24. sung Says:

    hi..lucy..
    i can imagine the environment you live in
    you are nearer than me living in noisy town
    to the NATURE..rocky mountains
    it’s really envious things to me
    i want this blog have function of loading Pictures
    then it’ll be more interesting and fun to communicate
    thanks for giving me some moment to visualize NATURE!!////

  25. iman Says:

    hi you guys please speak about being please

  26. Sereja Says:

    To china232:
    hi guys, are you planning to give us an opportunity to make “likes” or “thumb up”?
    ’cause there are plenty of wonderfull people, and i wanna give my respect to them.

  27. Jane Says:

    Hello, Andy, Add!
    I really appreciate what you do here. It works for me! I can understand without effort everything what you say. It is totally encouraging fact. (The situatuion was not so good year ago)
    My last night was pretty hard, I was in the train all night, and there was really stuffy on my upper bed and I can’t sleep. So I started to listen to your audio on my mp3 and that safe my mood:)
    On the one hand your podcasts are clear for listening but on the other hand there a lot of new information that one can get from them. That is really cool.
    Thank you guy for your effort.

    PS now i’m listening to your podcasts from 2007, it’s weird to hear your voices from the past:)

  28. Hamid Reza Says:

    Hi andy hi add,
    In my point of view, your teaching style is interesting and I really like that. You two guys have warm voices and your teaching method makes other guys believe themselves that they can speak and understand slang terms either. This is awesome, thank you dude. You know men my problem in English is that you have too many words and slang in English and sometimes I just want to hit the roof!!!! It totally drives me crazy but when I am thinking that I am going to leave my own country to continue my educational plan in a English spoken country (Australia) just in a few months later, I start to learn once again. Keep going guys you are great.
    Regarding your topic, it is my nightmare and every moments I think about it. I think about Australian people and their habits, believes and attitudes against Asian people. Encountering with new culture is both fantastic and frightening.
    I would be thankful if you guys share your experience with me when you were travelling to Shanghai for the first time.
    Thanks a 1000000.

  29. Neal Says:

    Hello, guys!

    My name is Neal. I am originally from Uzbekistan.

    In my opinion, the people of the same origin and culture always try to stick together in a foreign country. It’s a common practice. As a matter of fact, they try to encourage and support each other by providing some good advice, guidance and so on.

    Let’s say an American comes to China to work there for a long time. He gains some important skills there to survive. He learns a local language of the country, and finds a few nice European restaurants which serve delicious American food. If he gets to meet his countrymen in China, he definitely recommends them to visit one of the greatest restaurants he has already visited. Moreover, he helps them to choose a great training centre to learn Chinese to speak it as fluently as he does. It’s some kind of a social instinct to help those who are in need.

    As for choosing a soul mate, it’s fun for a person of one race to choose the person of another race. By doing this, both of these people exchange their cultures, religions, believes, values and life experience. They learn to respect and love the person who is different and unique. As they say: “What makes you different makes you beautiful”. From medical perspective, those marriage couples who come from different origins and have different genes, have healthy, smart and powerful next generations. That’s a medical fact.

  30. ouiza djenani Says:

    Hello guys,

    i really like this topic ,it`s interesting as we keep meeting new people in our lives.i certainly had this experience in the past, when i see some beautiful woman with an ugly guy i start wondering is she visually impaired ? i know i shouldn’t have asked this question but i am human , i sometimes think of myself as being critical but let`s face it this is a human nature. People are different and see things in different ways.
    I indeed appreciate what you are doing guys, your website is awesome and listening to your podcasts has helped me understanding english that is spoken by real native speakers, reading your blogs is of a great help for me ,i don`t even need to ask anyone else i`m already convinced. You are the best.
    Good luck ank keep up the great job.
    Ouiza from Algeria

  31. Lucy Says:

    It might not be my place to make such a comment since I’m a Chinese who has been living in Canada for only 9 months while Andy and Add are truly Canadians. But I guess my sense of fairness urges me to share some of what I have learned, observed and heard about the Canadian culture ever since I got here.

    Simply put, Canadian people are generally much nicer than Americans. No offense to American people and I’m not saying Americans are not nice. I’m just saying Canadians are nicer. People outside North America like to think Canadians and Americans are basically the same, while in fact they are not. Speaking the same language or having similar lifestyles doesn’t mean they are the same. It’s just like people from the same country or same city are not necessarily the same, even people from the same neighborhood can be very different. One key difference between Canada and the U.S. is Canada promotes multiculturalism whereas the U.S. does not. I’m amazed at how accepting and tolerant Canadian people are when facing so many immigrants from so many different cultural backgrounds and different parts of the world every year. Canadian people are very gentle. This is what I like about Canada the most:) Besides the multiculturalism, below are some other distinct features about the Canadian culture which I found on a website when I was doing a research about the Canadian culture as part my effort in adapting to
    the new environment. I hope these can help clear some of the common confusions or misconceptions regarding the American and Canadian cultures.

    * Canadians are more reserved than Americans less reserved than Brits. As their culture is divided into French and English areas slightly different rules apply.
    * Tradition and good manners are part of the culture.
    * A reserved and quiet demeanor is appreciated.
    * The phrase “You’re just like Americans” will chill most conversations – Canadians see themselves as a separate country and culture.
    * Most offices work on a first name basis
    * Bribes and “understandings” are not part of the business landscape.
    * Business is not discussed during a meal.
    * Personal space is valued in British areas – a two foot minimum is standard with no touching other than an initial handshake. In French areas this is not as important.
    * Female office staff are referred to as “women” not as “girls”
    * Racial, religious and sexual comments are avoided in most situations.

    Discussions about cultural differences are interesting, in the meantime can be sensitive as well. It’s so easy for people to label or generalize a certain group of people based on their limited insight into that particular culture/subculture, because it would demand less effort in trying to understand something that they are not familiar with. However, that will only create biases and stereotypes. Ironically, we all have been brainwashed to different extents by the media. It’s sad. While we have no control over the media, we can discipline ourselves. To have a clear perspective on life and people around us, there’s no easy way but keep learning so that we can constantly keep our preconceptions and wrong judgments in check.

  32. Hebert Says:

    I’m an English student, I’ve got your program which is really good and is helping my learning process grow faster. I can sense you are trying to be really transparent with your “clients” which in itself is really powerful and it says a lot about you as persons. If you don’t mind, let me give you some suggestions. This is just my opinion, but since you know your product is good and you are honest, you should try to convince your audience of the reasons why they should stick with you instead of giving them the freedom of going somewhere else, risking them being deceived by other useless methods. People don’t really know what is good for them at this point of their learning and will buy any product which looks good on the outside (you said that) and is even more expensive but ends up just being crap (is this rude to mention here?). Again, display the wonders of your program more bluntly, make your product look good, make comparisons with the other bad ones and your customers will notice they made a great choice, as I did. Have a great day!

Leave a Reply