Texting and Cell phone Culture…

I don’t expect everyone to agree with me on this, but I hate “text message culture”. I’d almost prefer to live in a world where texting didn’t exist. I hate spending time to type little messages. I am the kind of person who thinks, “If you’ve got something to say to me, just pick up the damn phone!”

It seems that some people are kind of shy on the phone too. I know a lot of guys will send a girl they met in a bar a text message. I think that’s super lame and shows the guy isn’t confident. I also hate the feeling of waiting for someone to reply to a message. You never know if they got the message and are just avoiding you, or if they haven’t checked their phone yet.

In my personal opinion, texting is great for things like giving someone a time, date, or address. It’s fine for simple “yes or no” or other simple answers, but it sucks for communication.

I also hate “text fights” in relationships. Those are the worst. I just refuse to argue over text messages. Maybe some people can handle it, but it gives me a huge headache and makes me feel like jumping out the window.

I hope the world goes back to just making phone calls when you want to talk to someone. I honestly think email is overused too now. It’s absolutely necessary, but sometimes just talking face to face or even on the phone makes things a lot easier and more clear.

So, I think people are overusing texting and it’s making the society worse and worse. I hate hanging out with my friends who are always looking at their phones to see if their girlfriends are texting them some kind of annoying message. I imagine girls hate the feeling of always having to check their phones too.

I wouldn’t be surprised if cell phones are one small reason that more and more people are getting divorced. It’s certainly not the whole story, but they seem to hurt relationships more than help them in my opinion.

…I guess I should also mention that if you believe someone is either sleeping or working, you should probably send a text rather than phone.

I hope texting becomes a smaller and smaller part of our culture, but I think it’s going to get worse!!!!!

I’d love to hear what you guys think. Pipe up and share your thoughts!

1. Do you think Cell phone culture is good for relationships and marriages (overall)? Why?

2. Do you think people should call more or text more?

3. Do you have similar feelings with me? Do you think I’m crazy?

4. Do you think a guy who meets a girl in a bar should call her or text her? Why? What do girls respect more?

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40 Responses to “Texting and Cell phone Culture…”

  1. Hailing Says:

    Dear guys,

    Thanks for the interesting article. I can’t agree with your ideas more. I am married and I make calls and text messages with my husband a lot. I assert to feel closer with him through calls than massages. Of course, texting messages can be much easier than making a direct call. You can do texting while you are doing varieties of things, such as in a class, in a meeting or in a noisy station. However, whatever busy you are, you should spend enough time on your close people.
    And also, making a direct call is much more efficient than messages. Your clients always have no time to reply your message. Are you willing to wait for ever? :)
    Thanks for your interesting topic which attracts me to write.

  2. sarowd Says:

    I think it’s most true but some how some people maybe are not a good taller like me but it doesn’t mean that I like to texting more than talking by cellphone. I hate to wait for my text’s reply , that really bother me because my most texts are important and order have to be done by the time I need . So I always call people. And about the girls I’ve to say if the audience is mature texting isn’t so bad but if she’s not I think it’s all wasting time you are going to lose your relationship by no experience.

  3. Mousa Says:

    I totally agree with you.

  4. FC Says:

    I am shy on the phone. And also, I am not good at chatting with other people but close friends on the phone. I think texting messages can give me some time to figure out what to reply, so I prefer a guy I meet at a bar sending me a text message. If we talk on the phone, we may run out of things to say and it can be akward.

  5. Ayman Abdalla Says:

    In my opinion, I think face-to-face communication is best in any type of relationship, if it is not possiable the phone conversation is the alternate way to communicate with other; otherwise, I think text messaging should be use only to send an information like an adress or, appointment time.

  6. Obada Says:

    Hiiiiii

    Loool, again with your awesome & amazingly ridiculous topis, I loveddddd.

    I agree with you and you are not crazy. I’m talking from experience though, texting are worse but still useful in many ways in our life as you said early. (not in a relationship at all).

    however, the last question I leave to others cause I’m not into it.

    Have a nice day!!

  7. Joe Says:

    I absolutely agree with you! Try to send emails to workmates in a big company and see how many of them reply. Most people are too busy and it’s almost always better to call them directly.

    However, texting has good sides, too: You can always read what the other person said if you don’t remember later! And btw not so many things are woth the time of making a call. Many things can just be said in a short message. The question is, where is the line between important and unimportant things?

  8. andrzej Says:

    Hi there,
    Most people agree that talking on the phone feels better but on the other hand why the number of text messages is on the rapid increase? if you ask yourself honestly do you text more often than you call the answer probably be yes. More often then not we get in touch with people with whom we just exchange information (and might not like them ) so texting is better. When you really like someone and they are your real friends then you call them.

  9. Kirill Koshelev Says:

    Good article, but I am not totally agree with you. I.m very communicative man, I like to talk to people face by face. But I like to use messages too for different causes. For example…
    Sometimes sms can be more romantic than phone call when you just start new relations with woman (or man). In phone talk you would know everything about each other in an hour. But with text you’d know this in a week, step by step. You prepare you first dates step by step, message by message. And you have a time to think how to right answer questions as well as.
    Besides I like to use internet-messangers. Their main advantage before face-by-face comunications is that you can answer messages when you’ll have a free time for it. You haven’t anwer in a moment (you can be busy or be in bad mood for this conversation) and this is great advantage in my opinion.
    But of course you shouldn’t use ICQ for messages which need urgent answer. It’s much better to use phone for this)).

  10. Paul King Says:

    I absolutely agree with you, Andy. I can’t stand it at all. When I get a message I usually respond by calling the person. I think it’s easier to call the person than text a message. Nowadays, when I look around and see people, they seem to me like they’re totally obsessed about their cell phones. I have a colleague who can’t live without a cell phone. He is all day on the Internet and talks with his friends. When I ask him: What the hell are you doing on the cell all day? His simply excuse is: “I’m killing time.” I noticed that people like to text because it’s easier than talking face to face. Apparently they feel more comfortable and confident, but I don’t like this form of communication. I also can’t understand how people can spend all their time on Facebook and talk trash like: “I’m starving, I’m going to take a shower or what are you doing right now?” I think it’s ridiculously stupid behavior and absolutely procrastinating time about nothing. I don’t want to offend anybody but people should spend their time with real things then stay all day in cyber space.
    I use my cell phone just for listening to your podcast since I moved to the U.S. and I have to say I don’t need it at all.
    Anyway, thank you for this interesting blog. Have a good one, guys !!!

  11. Annuar Says:

    I agree with some points I only do texting for some important or urgent matter. I also noticed that people who like texting are abusing languanges. What I meant is, they always use shortform which is not understandable and meaningless. I consider as a shy person, so sometime I prefer to do texting rather than to call that person. And since my english is not that good, I hate to answer any pohonecalls at work.

  12. Daniel Says:

    Hey guys

    First I wanna thank you guys for these articles that you’ve been publishing, these varieties of subjects make us learn English easier, cuz you bring fun texts and updated with what we’ve been living.
    I know that you guys are Canadian, and I must say that I’ve been in Canada twice just for studying English at UofT, so I really like listening to your podcast, I like the canadian accent, eh!

    About text messages, I do text a lot with my friends that I’ve made in Canada, cuz you know, most of them are from others countries, so it’s very simple and cheap.

    However I also agree with you, sometimes it’s much simple just make a phone call..
    But what I’ve noticed here in brazil is that people prefer to text cuz it’s cheaper than calling, for example you can send unlimited messages for less than 20cents per day, it’s incredible cheap.
    If you make a phone call you’re gonna pay around 1dollar per minute.

    Anyway this is my comment, I hope you like it.

  13. Rema Hnamte Says:

    I agree with you at some points but not totally. There’s no denying that texting has become so common that it’s sometimes ridiculous talking to someone toying with their cellphones typing and talking back to us without seeming to know even what they are saying. That’s just terrible! However, messages are pretty useful when you are in situations which aren’t so suitable for you to talk and when you need to tell someone addresses and numbers.

    What we need is some cellphone etiquette. Talking or texting, cellphone users need to know that their tiny handset could be quite helpful or annoying to others.

    Good article, Andy.

  14. Zhanna Says:

    Hi Andy!
    I don’t agree with you totally, but yes, sometimes we need to just talk to make clear the situation, to understand, to reach each other correctly.
    But on the other hand, texting is very useful, interesting and funny.
    I love to talk with guys by phone, but at same time I like to have that awaiting feeling of foretaste while opening the incoming message from him and then finding something funny and cute in there. But this thing is good when you already know each other for a while. But when you don’t, it’s better to call and talk ‘ cause it is more helpful for persons who just met to realize if you need to contact with person.

  15. Ramesh Says:

    Hi Andy,

    Yes there are a few things that really make sense. Like texting is great for things like giving someone a time, date, or address. It’s fine for simple “yes or no” or other simple answers, but should not be substituted for communication purposes. And to hang out with friends who are always looking at their phones to see if their girlfriends are texting, also is kinda annoying. And finally, in order to find out whether someone is either sleeping or working, we should probably send a text rather than phone them and find out for ourselves if s/he is sleeping or working.

    Keep up the good work. Really appreciate what you are doing.

    Ramesh

  16. Asad Says:

    Text massaging while driving in one of my pet peeves. It is risky and you can be involved in a fatal accident because of a lack of concentration at hand. It really boils my blood when my close friends do that while driving. Also, text massaging instead of making phone calls comes across quite cheap and make someone come across more like a cheapo and impersonal.
    I have a cheap mobile phone and I use it for what it is meant to do , making phone calls. For other stuff such as listening to music, and surfing the net I have other tools for that. That’s all I want to say, and I’m totally in agreement with you on this.

  17. Ivan Kolev Says:

    Hi guys, interesting topic, because it’s ridiculous , because it makes you think. There is nothing wrong to send a message to someone, but emphasize only if it makes sense to do so. And not just because you’re bored and write shit. Regard to the guy who meets a girl in a bar should call her or text her .I will call her because this sound male and really. I mean you’re serious about it, and your intentions are serious. I think that phones are a necessity as long as people know that they are made for the convenience of life, not bothering.

  18. Ira Says:

    Hi everyone,

    I agree up to a point. I would definitely call the person intead of messaging. I stink at texting. But young people seem to love this form of communication. Here in Brazil it’s cheaper to text. It might be one of the reasons that has increased the amount of messages people have been sending. Another reason could be something related to the similarity of instant messengers, such as MSN, Skype or Facebook chat. They got used to texting and they are really fast at doing it.
    A friend of mine said she would prefer to receive a message, so then she would reply to it whenever she wanted to.
    I don’t think it’s good or bad for a relationship. I think people should have it clear. If they agreed on texting or calling each other or both. Great! For me it’s just like “don’t text me cause I’m not reading” and of course my husband knows that. ;)
    I agree with you when you mention “text fights”…Give me a break! I wouldn’t even reply to it.
    Well, this is just an opinion of someone who hates cell phones. ;)

  19. farzam Says:

    Hi friends. It was very interesting and I’ve been involved for a while. Because my brother just sent me a text and I should ring him up with trying to send a text and I was sure it was dull. Finally, I asked him about important things and do not stop just a short message, “Call to me and he agreed.Thanks

  20. Samar Says:

    hi,

    i am 100% agree with this..i also have the similar thoughts..i hate texting and even writing emails..i am the person who likes to talk on phone or face to face with friends and everyone..as i consider it the best way..i think text messages increase distances and it’s just not good..so i think that people should call more. Maybe you’re crazy so is everyone nothing to worry about that…guys should call a girl..it is more respected..!! nice blog!

  21. Estephede CHARLES Says:

    Hi There,
    The topic is totally right to me. I hate texting messages specifically when something bad you do not like from me happens. So, I always say to people please I do not accept sms from anybody if there is a problem between you and I .In the case you just want to let me know that you need me and want to explain to me , it does not matter. by the way, Face-to-face communication is real, and the eye contact is so so important when people talking.

  22. Mahboubeh Says:

    I guess testing is not that bad, its specially useful when I have to say something to someone and I don’t like her or him and don’t wanna hear from her/him I’d rather to text them. Although texting has lots of problems, I’d prefer to text most of the time.its easier and when someone did not answered you may get less upset, because you may think that he/she has not seen your text or forgot to answer. But seriously when a guy wanna date a girl its really insulting if he text her, he should really cal her, its the way that girl feel respected, Im a girl and hate guys who text me for the first time, seriously Im saying guys, if you wanna ask a girl out, pick up the damn phone!

  23. Amanda Batista Says:

    Very true! Msgs are a way to be in touch and avoid people at the same time. We humans can be very weird and sad.
    Thank you for sharing so many useful information on the podcasts and the website in general, it’s the best idea I’ve seen, I’m improving my English and learning lots of new things here!

  24. Mamoti Says:

    Hi
    I agree with you. And one more request from you, I don’t know English very well and i want to know all the stuff in English. So why you don’t teach about sexuality words.
    Thankyou

  25. sera Says:

    hi
    In my opinion texting message is so boring ant takes more time than calling. I alwasy call people and i wanna hear people’s voice.
    thank you for topic :)

  26. sara Says:

    I think it is absolutely vital to know how to use our mobile phone.Some people cannot chat on the phone easily so they can send message to other people. I believe texting message is cheaper and you can say anything to your friend.
    I agree with you.People must learn the way of using the mobile phone.

  27. Mehdi Says:

    Hi
    Yes, I totally agree with you!
    I will cost a lot if you want talk to your girlfriend about every thing over the cellphone. Text messages are not efficient and also take a lot of time.

    the best way is dating at a bar, park, or cafe. there you can say what ever you want. So the next day your mind will be empty of all those matters and you can easily focus on your work.
    thanks

  28. Mahdi Says:

    hi
    i like it to write and receive text messages. Sometimes we can lie more comfortable by texts rather than phone calls when its needed! But try to be honest even when your writing.
    Thank you.

  29. Domingo Meza Says:

    Yes, people today is ridiculous overusing their cell phones. They never watch the persons’ eyes but the screen phones all the time. It’s stupid. It has created an antisocial society, nobody looks at neither his/her neighbor nor watches his/her steps for walking. Many people fall on the streets, or on up and down stairs. During the classes students are sending messages themselves creating a very low level of attention to the teachers. In the family children don’t pay attention when greatparents or parents try to talk to them. Everybody has one cell phone, and thus everyone is prisoner inside his/her own world. Nobody has to do with anyone. This is the great advance of our brilliant civilization. It’s the “breakthrough” of our civilized society. Hey Andy & Add very thanks for this article. You, as always, put us to reflect. God bless you. Domingo.

  30. sahar Says:

    hi
    first of all,i should say i’m not good at english,in fact i’m a beginner.
    i think todays sending message causes that people be so rude .
    in somecases when you want to tell someone what you really think or feel , maybe it seems sending message does work.but after that you should be await for her or his reaction.
    what he or she think about you? is it like before?

  31. nima Says:

    thnks for your help

  32. nima Says:

    thanks for your help

  33. Mahshid Says:

    Thank you for another interesting article.yes absoloutly it’s true.I agree and I think that text messege is one of the worst invention of all time.you can’t send your feelings with sms and in my opinion it makes people become more alone.I had a bad experience and I had a fight with my boyfriend theough text messeging and I can’t still imagine whether he was happy or sad and other things…

  34. arezoo Says:

    I agree with you but sometimes I prefer sending message.Some of my friends live in another country and it’s better not to wake up them.

  35. Asa Says:

    Recently one of a Taiwan cell phone company has a project for those ppl who are using the same Comm will not have to pay anything, and it’s called “inner network benefit”.
    The reason I mention this is because this project has another nickname known as ” break up project” due to the fact that it will force you to call your gf/bf at any leisure time no matter where you are;therefore you get a greater chance having a qurrel with your bf/gf…

    HAHA. It’s funny, isn’t it?
    Of course. I wish cell phone had never existed.All things should get to the way they’re used to be.

  36. grace Says:

    hi
    It depends on how and when we use our cellphones. I can’t leave the house without making sure it’s with me. Over all, in my opinion cellphones are basically made to make communication much easier, it’s just that people in our generation abuse it’s use..

  37. Carola Says:

    Hi Andy,

    I agree with you, I hate when someone text me all the time it drive me crazy. I think communication will much easier and clear when people will talk and not texting all the time or sends e-mail. I prefer talking on the phone, because I love hear someone voice. Sorry for many mistake, my english is not very good. Thanks for your help your blog is great :)

  38. Mardy Says:

    I thought it’s funny to see this article, it makes me remind u were saying something like that on the one of the lessons. In my opinion, I don’t think texting message is such a big deal, it’s just one of the ways people don’t want to be that directly communicating with people, somehow they just need an invisible distance instead. But when things come to the relationship with girl, it becomes a bit complicating, when u are just starting dating. Sometimes U might feel like there is not much to say on the phone, but I really want my lover to know I’m missing him or her. And then texting a message to him or her perhaps means, hey, I do care about u even though I’m not thinking about anything else or being space out, ha ha.

  39. Bethel Toohey Says:

    Thank you, I have recently been looking for information approximately this topic for a long time and yours is the greatest I’ve came upon so far. However, what concerning the conclusion? Are you sure in regards to the source?

  40. maciek Says:

    Texting messages sucks. What really annoys me are people who start conversation by texting, I mean conversations that require sending at least four or even more text messages. Do these people really have time on their hands or they just want make other person to call them so they could save some money ;) . Usually I am the one who give up on texting and start calling other person to stop this ridiculous form of conversation. Nevertheless texting sometimes is more advisible and convenient, just like you Ad mentioned before for example to let someone know about your decision over some appointment etc. So it is all about finding out whether texting or calling would be more effective in particular conversation you are going to get into. Unfortunately some people do not seem to catch that and that is why texting become more and more popular.

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